Something I've been thinking alot about lately is how easily we let ourselves be fooled. Specifically, how easily we allow ourselves to just see the good sides of someone. How blind we allow ourselves to be for the sake of appreciation; how many faults we can forgive for the sake of perfection. It's like speeding past warning signs, thinking that if we don't stop and think about the risks then the danger isn't real. Except it is. It still and always is.
The biggest part of growing up for me has been around breaking down this fallability, my insistant inclination to just want to like someone. To excuse everything that doesn't fit into my idealised view of them; to chose not to see anything that isn't good. And it's kind of unfair. Not just to me, but to them. To place them on this piedestal, have them represent everything good about humanity, when they're in reality just these flawed lonely humans like everyone else.
But it's also unfair to me. Because when you decide to let someone close without taking into account their lesser sides, when you decide to trust someone without seeing all of them, you make yourself vulnerable to people undeserving of it. See people as complex beings, sure, and realise that every person is a pryzm of goods and bads, but also, allow yourself a standard of decency. Don't let just anyone close. Don't put them on any piedestal they don't deserve.
We love being fooled. We love only listening to the voices of appreciation when we meet someone new. When they've just fallen into your world and everything and everyone seems to focus around how brilliant this new person is. We love that. And we love listening to and believing it. Perfection is such an intriguing illusion, and all we want to do is fall for it.